Can a soul be mixed?

[Hitleriano1440]

For example: Can a soul be 28% black, 25% asian and 47% white?

 

[Seby]

Aren't arabs, latinos and american natives their own race?
Isn't their soul the same?

 

[hailourtruegod]

Aren't arabs, latinos and american natives their own race?
Isn't their soul the same?

Can you elaborate on the second question?

From what I read the answer to your first question is yes. They are their own race, respectively.

 

[Seby]

Aren't arabs, latinos and american natives their own race?
Isn't their soul the same?

Can you elaborate on the second question?

From what I read the answer to your first question is yes. They are their own race, respectively.

I meant that maybe even their soul is a different race (arab, latino) . Hence they (I think) reincarnate in arab or latino bodies.

 

[Wayofthegods]

Thank you for answering! But is there a way to know which race my soul belongs to? Although my skin color is white I am mixed.

you could ask your GD. (Guardien Demon) . Always ask over Satan and try the pressure method, pressure at belly jes , pressure at chest no, explain it before then ask. if you don´t know your GD use a ouija bord but look at the safety instruktions on jos. /Ouija.html ---> links.

https://www.templeofzeus.org/www.angelfire.com/empire/serpentis666
https://www.templeofzeus.org/www.angelfire.com/empire/serpentis666/DEMONOLATRY.html

found a better way to finding your GD thanks to ghost in the machine

If You Have Trouble Finding Your Guardian Demon
By Caitlin/Silvercrab, Satanic Gay Community Member

The mistake most new people make is attempting to find their Guardian through a pendulum or Ouija
board. If you have absolutely no past experience or practice with these items, they probably won‟t work
for you. Using a Ouija board or pendulum takes SKILL and PRACTICE. When you‟re new, you must
be in a trance and completely disconnect yourself from the board or you will end up talking to yourself,
which is a very common occurrence. There is also a chance a negative entity might interfere with
communication or fool you into believing they‟re a Demon and give you false information. So as you
can see, a lot can go wrong here if you aren‟t already skilled in these areas.

So, how do you find your Guardian? There are many reliable ways, such as Astral Projection, Astral
Merging, using a black mirror, or invoking the Demon. But all these are advanced methods which most
people are unable to do until they are at least on the intermediate level. So for beginners, here are a few
things you can do to narrow down the list.

Go look through ALL the Demons listed on templeofzeus.org, even the “High Ranking Gods and
Crowned Princes of Hell” section because hey, you never know. Also, don‟t forget the section
underneath the S - Z Demons titled “More Gods”. Not everyone‟s Guardian Demon is going to be one
of the 72 Goetic Demons, but that doesn‟t mean your Guardian is any less special. Pazuzu, for example,
is not one of the 72 Goetic Demons, but he is very powerful and is a great protector. Write down the
names of the Demons who interest you, the ones you really like. Once you have a complete list of
Demons who attract you, apply these tips:

*Your Guardian Demon will usually have the same element(s) as you. When I say that, I‟m not referring
to your astrological sign, I‟m referring to the element you love the most. You do not need experience
with invoking the elements to figure out which one is your favorite. To read information on each one,
see the section “Advanced Meditations”, in the Joy of Satan website.

*Kudos to Reverend Mageson and Jake for figuring this one out. The sex of your
Guardian is usually dependant on your own sexuality. Meaning, the straight man has a female Guardian,
the homosexual man has a male Guardian. Even the most evenly split of bisexuals have a preference. If
you‟re a bisexual woman who likes other women just a little bit more than men, chances are you‟ll have
a female Guardian. I believe this pattern has to do with what you‟re most comfortable with.

Now that you‟ve narrowed down your list (but please remember that the above tips are not set in stone
and might not apply to everyone) ask yourself these questions:

“Am I truly comfortable with the idea of _____________ being my Guardian Demon?” When I was
new, there were several Demons I thought looked very cool and kick ass, but when I thought about it
after a few days, I realized the idea just didn‟t feel quite right.

“Do I love absolutely everything about ______________?” This is self-explanatory. There may be a
Demon that you really like and respect, but if you embrace the idea of him/her as your Guardian and you
feel a consistent longing to keep looking at other Demons, then he/she probably isn‟t the one. When you
find your true Guardian, you should feel a strong bond, an unquestioning love. Most people have been
with their Guardian in many other lifetimes, which is where that feeling comes from.

And finally, “Is there any reason to believe ______________ would not suit me as a Guardian?” Don‟t
just take the information listed about the Demon into account. You‟re probably not going to have
everything in common with your Guardian. For example, someone with Bifrons as their Guardian might
be very interested in necromancy and astrology, but not in learning the magical properties of herbs and
stones. Use your intuition with this question.
By now you should have narrowed down your list to only one or two Demons. Now comes the part
where you figure out if He/She is really your Guardian:

Get yourself into a deep trance.

Vibrate the name of the Demon 30 - 40 times. (Ex: Amon. A-A-A-A-M-M-M-M-O-O-O-O-N-N-N-N).

After a while, you should feel his/her energy. Connect with the Demon as best you can.
Ask _____________ if he/she is your Guardian. You will probably not see or hear anything if you are
not psychically open, but you should FEEL their response.. Interpreting energy like this might be
difficult at first, and if you don‟t understand the response, then tell them you don‟t understand and ask
for a stronger signal. If you receive a very warm, positive signal then you‟ve probably found your
Guardian. If not, go back over your list and try again.

Except Cobra debunked this as false. Also the Demon names are not all positive, alot are Hebrew and should not be chanted.

 

[Fuchs]

you could ask your GD. (Guardien Demon) . Always ask over Satan and try the pressure method, pressure at belly jes , pressure at chest no, explain it before then ask. if you don´t know your GD use a ouija bord but look at the safety instruktions on jos. /Ouija.html ---> links.

https://www.templeofzeus.org/www.angelfire.com/empire/serpentis666
https://www.templeofzeus.org/www.angelfire.com/empire/serpentis666/DEMONOLATRY.html

found a better way to finding your GD thanks to ghost in the machine

If You Have Trouble Finding Your Guardian Demon
By Caitlin/Silvercrab, Satanic Gay Community Member

The mistake most new people make is attempting to find their Guardian through a pendulum or Ouija
board. If you have absolutely no past experience or practice with these items, they probably won‟t work
for you. Using a Ouija board or pendulum takes SKILL and PRACTICE. When you‟re new, you must
be in a trance and completely disconnect yourself from the board or you will end up talking to yourself,
which is a very common occurrence. There is also a chance a negative entity might interfere with
communication or fool you into believing they‟re a Demon and give you false information. So as you
can see, a lot can go wrong here if you aren‟t already skilled in these areas.

So, how do you find your Guardian? There are many reliable ways, such as Astral Projection, Astral
Merging, using a black mirror, or invoking the Demon. But all these are advanced methods which most
people are unable to do until they are at least on the intermediate level. So for beginners, here are a few
things you can do to narrow down the list.

Go look through ALL the Demons listed on templeofzeus.org, even the “High Ranking Gods and
Crowned Princes of Hell” section because hey, you never know. Also, don‟t forget the section
underneath the S - Z Demons titled “More Gods”. Not everyone‟s Guardian Demon is going to be one
of the 72 Goetic Demons, but that doesn‟t mean your Guardian is any less special. Pazuzu, for example,
is not one of the 72 Goetic Demons, but he is very powerful and is a great protector. Write down the
names of the Demons who interest you, the ones you really like. Once you have a complete list of
Demons who attract you, apply these tips:

*Your Guardian Demon will usually have the same element(s) as you. When I say that, I‟m not referring
to your astrological sign, I‟m referring to the element you love the most. You do not need experience
with invoking the elements to figure out which one is your favorite. To read information on each one,
see the section “Advanced Meditations”, in the Joy of Satan website.

*Kudos to Reverend Mageson and Jake for figuring this one out. The sex of your
Guardian is usually dependant on your own sexuality. Meaning, the straight man has a female Guardian,
the homosexual man has a male Guardian. Even the most evenly split of bisexuals have a preference. If
you‟re a bisexual woman who likes other women just a little bit more than men, chances are you‟ll have
a female Guardian. I believe this pattern has to do with what you‟re most comfortable with.

Now that you‟ve narrowed down your list (but please remember that the above tips are not set in stone
and might not apply to everyone) ask yourself these questions:

“Am I truly comfortable with the idea of _____________ being my Guardian Demon?” When I was
new, there were several Demons I thought looked very cool and kick ass, but when I thought about it
after a few days, I realized the idea just didn‟t feel quite right.

“Do I love absolutely everything about ______________?” This is self-explanatory. There may be a
Demon that you really like and respect, but if you embrace the idea of him/her as your Guardian and you
feel a consistent longing to keep looking at other Demons, then he/she probably isn‟t the one. When you
find your true Guardian, you should feel a strong bond, an unquestioning love. Most people have been
with their Guardian in many other lifetimes, which is where that feeling comes from.

And finally, “Is there any reason to believe ______________ would not suit me as a Guardian?” Don‟t
just take the information listed about the Demon into account. You‟re probably not going to have
everything in common with your Guardian. For example, someone with Bifrons as their Guardian might
be very interested in necromancy and astrology, but not in learning the magical properties of herbs and
stones. Use your intuition with this question.
By now you should have narrowed down your list to only one or two Demons. Now comes the part
where you figure out if He/She is really your Guardian:

Get yourself into a deep trance.

Vibrate the name of the Demon 30 - 40 times. (Ex: Amon. A-A-A-A-M-M-M-M-O-O-O-O-N-N-N-N).

After a while, you should feel his/her energy. Connect with the Demon as best you can.
Ask _____________ if he/she is your Guardian. You will probably not see or hear anything if you are
not psychically open, but you should FEEL their response.. Interpreting energy like this might be
difficult at first, and if you don‟t understand the response, then tell them you don‟t understand and ask
for a stronger signal. If you receive a very warm, positive signal then you‟ve probably found your
Guardian. If not, go back over your list and try again.

Except Cobra debunked this as false. Also the Demon names are not all positive, alot are Hebrew and should not be chanted.

Could you link the post?

 

[SixSixtySix]

I'be always heard that "we are not the body but eternal spirit souls" from Hindus.
I guess that's bull shit then? :lol:

 

[Rook]

I was diagnosed with a rare non-hereditary genetic disorder that seems like it's probably related to a problem I've struggled with my whole life, and in past lives as well. I realised the problem isn't caused by dross or outside influence, but that it's simply how I am. However, it remains a problem for me regardless, both physically, spiritually and mentally.

I guess the fact that you didn't say much about it means that you don't want too and it's most likely very personal, but if this is part of who you are, then why is it a problem?
Regardless i do know that the 1st steps to solving a problem is usually knowing and understanding it.
Astrology has helped me immensely in learning and understanding myself, as well as fixing issues that appeared in my life as i understood them better, perhaps astrology can help you?

But besides that if you don't ask questions you won't get answers, have you ever asked Satan about your problem?
As i too had some personal problems and have received guidance on them.

 

[Rook]

...

if you aren't comfortable being yourself then perhaps you're insecure in some way.
Does this come from a general dislike for whatever aspect of yourself, or is it on how others would view you?
If it's sexual, then your sex life is your own business and no one needs to know about it.
also denial of a thing can cause you look at said thing as a bad thing.
Either way you don't need to do a thing if you're not comfortable with it, in fact that's a good reason to not do it.

I've had astral experiences some negative, some pleasurable, some amazing, but i don't write them because when it comes to astral experiences and psychic divination these things should be scrutinized heavily, be careful what you trust.
And i am serious.

What you consider to be a past life regression could very well be what someone wanted you to experience,
there were times where i gained understanding of something by experiencing it, it felt real to me at the time, but i didn't know it was an 'experience' that was given until i woke up, and understood what had happened.

You really need to be aware if there are anything connected to you, or around you.
The astral isn't some void with noting in it, there a lot of things there, and any Zevism that advances themselves will inevitably attract attention.

But it's a good sign since it all seems to correspond with your birth chart, also another thing about astrology, be wary of where you get your info from like there are some astrological bullshit out there.
I remember reading something about Virgo, where it said that the sign is selfless and servile or something like that, that never sounded right to me because i know for one i never liked taking bullshit from anyone, or having to change what i say because of people's feeling or something getting in the way, i never liked having to sugar coat anything, not selfless either, because i'm pretty greedy and selfish ngl.

But these things never felt right to me, until i started hearing the name, Minerva/Astarte/Athena came into my mind, so i decided to look her up, after doing a little research i realize that Athena is associated with the sign Virgo, and after asking for some help to understand what she's like more, i found out that she doesn't take bullshit from anyone, like she's a very independent and untrammeled goddess in the Greek mythos, she didn't take bullshit from anyone, she's a god of war and extremely elegant and intelligent in the Greek mythos.

The moon was another thing i was having odd feelings about, there's even an aspect in the chart called the 'dark moon', sometimes referred to as Lilith, and well a similar thing happened, came across the name Lilith so many times, i couldn't ignore it, decided to do some research on her, and i mean she's very prominent in Satanism, so you know there's a lot of blaspheme out there, but even then you read about her, you learn she's not servile or submissive at all, she doesn't take bullshit from anyone, and she is also NOT someone anyone wants to mess with either.

I mean besides that, Lilith and my GD helped me quite a lot in accepting my darker side and realizing that evil is a necessary thing, and that my sadism isn't really a bad thing at all, it's just the way i am, and i do take a lot of pleasure in making my enemies suffer pain, she taught me how to have a lot of fun, and my GD he encouraged me a lot too, he's always been there for me and very supportive of who i am despite all the shit i gave him.
Like many of my friends know i was gone for quite a while, Lilith and my GD(and some other gods too) helped me get myself back in order again, the experience was worth, they really taught me the meaning of family and what it means to have my back when trouble hits, and people that accept me for who i am.

Btw what's in your chart isn't set in stone either, you don't have to just take the events woven by fate, with enough power you can take control of fate and change things to do way you want it to be.
Positive change is also another thing, never forgotten who you were, and the humble begins in which you came from, sometimes when people achieve success they forgot who they were and what it was like to struggle, they end up changing for the worse.

Anyways all this thing about, desires, abnormality, being 'different' like are you some kind of freak? i mean noting wrong with that.
Perhaps you should reach out to Lilith?

It's true that I'm uncomfortable and insecure. I'm not bothered as much anymore what other people might think of me nowadays, and I do have an incredibly loving partner who makes all of this so much more bearable as he's often reassured me that he's never thought I'm weird or worth less because of it, but even so there are still things about it that get to me.

I'm blessed with such good looks and smarts that I've always been attractive to men and women alike, but who's going to marry me if I can't have children with either? That kind of rejection is something I clearly felt during past life regression. A deep and monogamous relationship is very important to me, which I know because I remember trying to settle for casual sex in that life but felt so empty and unfulfilled in the end. And in lives where the church was more prominent, I faced discimination and was murdered or worse.

I struggled with social anxiety for most of this life as a result, but it just disappeared almost completely when I remembered those things and realised that people nowadays aren't going to kill me just for being different, even if they can tell.

In this life I was seemingly able to avoid most of those problems, and as you say experiences like that ought to be taken with a grain of salt as they aren't always the most reliable or consistent. But much of it was shown to me after I asked my Guardian about it, and seeing it helped me overcome so many of my irrational fears about how others see me. And even putting those alleged bad experiences aside, it's been my dream to be a mother someday since I was little. Why would I just be able to accept that I can't?

With all the rapid medical advancements that are happening these days, maybe that could change and even I will be able to do it. But if I only rely on that and don't change my genes, then it'll be the same problem all over again when I reincarnate. Not to mention how incredibly long I need to wait each time. The only way a body like mine can be created is through a rare mutation in an individual egg or sperm cell, and then there's so many other conditions that need to be met too. It feels like I've had to wait for over a century at times. If not for the Gods, I don't know if I would even exist anymore at this point, with compatible bodies being so rare.

If just I could be completely male or completely female, then surely sex would be easier and more fulfilling, and I would finally be able to have children of my own too. I would be able to reincarnate so much more reliably too if anything happens and I need to again. Between the two, I would rather be a woman since that's closer to how I feel inside, although I know trauma from past lives played a role in that as the extensive discrimination I faced caused me to reject my masculine side. But after overcoming most of that trauma, I realise that's still simply how I've always felt, and I'm merely less restrained; nothing changed about what I want.

The idea of reaching out to Lilith scares me a bit. It says on the website that She only reaches out to those She chooses, and is not to be summoned. She's also said to be a patron Goddess and liberator of women. Does someone like me who is incomplete really have any right to reach out to Her? There my insecurity shows again... I'll try to be open to it at least. I know the Gods are incredibly kind.

I know it may be ambitious, but I really think I'll be the happiest if I make my genes more normal and my body more functional. That's why I think that even if the kind of mutation that caused me to be born is "natural", it isn't something I want to carry with me forever.

I'll at least try to go about it in a less Plutonian way than is suggested in my chart, and approach it more positively. With such an amazing partner who is willing to marry me despite it, the best I can do is go about it patiently and with open expectations. Whatever progress I make is wonderful, but even if I get stuck at any point then that's okay because I'm already good enough, even like this. I've realised that by now. Even so, I can't help but dream and give my all to overcome everything holding me back from living to the fullest.

Well i see now,
ain't noting wrong with you at all, you really be searching for a cure when there's no disease.
seems like you're using those experiences to justify a problem that doesn't exist.
You want my advise, don't let the past stop you from being who you are, you're Zevism aren't you?

There's noting wrong in your genetics, noting wrong in being mixed.
What's stopping you from having kids? you infertile or something?
I hope you don't want to have kids just because you're mixed, because that's dumb imo ngl.

Your sex life, is your own business, no one needs to know that, do what you want, if it's uncomfortable to you then you ain't gotta do shit.

"If just I could be completely male or completely female"
"caused me to reject my masculine side"
Like i'm not sure if you read what i said above, about Athena, but if you look at her in the Greek mythos you'd know she was quite 'manly/masculine', straight up badass, mainly depicted with a spear, shield and male warrior's helm, she is a goddess of war after all.
You don't have to subscribe to any male/female archetype to be you or have fun.

Pretty sure the reason why Lilith reached out to me was because i was coming across her name and things related to her a lot, but like you i had anxiety and didn't despite really wanting to because from the research i did on her, she really seemed to be the person i should go to at the time.
Also no one said you had to summon her, just speak, in your mind with the intent that it's directed to her.

You can't be afraid to live this life, You won't know someone unless you reach out to them, can't spend your life living in fear, what's there to be afraid of anyways? You're Zevism aren't you? family.
Also i'll just mention that fearlessness does not mean stupidity, there's a difference.

"I know the Gods are incredibly kind"
You know this? you know the gods?
Cuz this ain't the case for me, my GD if i had to describe him, he'd be the 'realist'.
He gives me the truth, even if that truth hurts my feelings, i get what i ask for.
It's raw, he's serious, but he's fun and charming at the same time, he's 'real' not fake kindness, sometimes hard decisions need to be made, but this is me, and how i cultivated my relationship with my GD, each god, are their own individual and do things differently, from my experience that is.

So how you gonna know what a god is like, without meeting or interacting with that person? you just gonna take someone's word for it?
Like i said, can't be afraid to live this life, gotta make moves, gotta stand your ground and for what you believe in.

 

[Rook]

I'm not talking about archetypes, but about my genetics and Soul. I wasn't sure if I should mention it explicitly since I'm not the most comfortable with it, but I'm intersex. That's why I'm unable to have children.

No, I'm not mixed race. I guess in a sense I'm "mixed sex", but that's a ridiculous way to put it and it's not like I really want to be. That's just how my chromosomes are. If I could just be a normal woman, I would prefer that so much. My partner says I am anyway, but that doesn't mean I don't suffer because of the shortcomings of my body. This is a real issue that I wish to overcome.

As I mentioned, I don't reject my masculine side anymore. Rather than adhering to norms of masculinity or femininity, I just do whatever I feel like, since I see no reason not to. But being genetically in-between has significant downsides, both physically and spiritually. That's why I would rather change and try to remove this abnormality from my Soul. If nothing else, then at least so that I can have children like I always wanted to. But I think it would be liberating in many other ways too, not just that.

Up until recently I tried comparing myself to transgender people, because they also want to change the sexual characteristics of their body. I thought I would be able to relate to them, but each one I met was either a depraved creep or a weakling who complained all day and did nothing to improve their situation (or both). Many of them are very ugly and look nothing like what they claim they are, and some of them act like entitled psychopaths and say people should be forced to date them, as if other ugly people with terrible personalities don't face the same issues they do. They're obnoxious, and in the end I wasn't able to relate to any of them.

I also tried comparing myself to homosexual people, who are also unable to have children because of their nature. But luis here on the forums explained to me that it isn't natural for homosexuals to want children in the first place, so I guess I'm not like them either. I know that for me, there's nothing unnatural about wanting such a normal thing.

I realised that looking for people I can relate to may be a pointless endeavour. Norms and stereotypes don't determine whether I'm allowed to exist. I want to exist, and that's enough. That's why I decided that so long as I'm able to survive, I'm allowed to exist.

You're intersex?
so you're physically unable to have kids?

You really are a freak, btw did you ever listen to the song i linked in my 2nd reply to you here? if not you should.

I'd just say right now if you've got a woman's body and you have a penis, some people would straight up worship you as a god, people like that are highly coveted, it's a very popular porn category, dickgirl/futa.
Someone with a male's body and vagina(femboy) are also coveted by many.

Like some people straight up try to transform themselves into these things to live their fantasy, if you were born with mixed gender features, then bruh, you crazy for wanting to be normal.
I was right, you really are searching for a cure when there's no disease.

Like you could be having some real freakish fun/sex, but you're here being all confused about yourself, smh.
"That's why I decided that so long as I'm able to survive, I'm allowed to exist."
You tryin to survive, when you could be thriving, perhaps once you understand that you've been fuckin blessed to be born the way you are.

 

[User47826193]

We have sex astrally instead.

How does that work? How can doing something astrally satisfy the physical? That would be like astrally weightlifting, it’s not giving you big muscles or any of the physical benefits so how does it satiate the need for physical exercise?

 

[Rook]

...

You keep saying, if I was completely this or that,
man, that irritates me, my gamer friends always telling man, man look at these e-girls on twitch, look how easy they have it, all they gotta do is show tits and do fuck all to make tons of money.
got feminists on the other end, saying how easy men have it, and how much 'privilege' they got.
like, bruh.
Everyone thinks if they were 'this' or 'that' there problems would just magically go away, it won't.
Easy to see the things in others, that you do not have.

I've been asking why you can't have kids, because I sympathize with your desires, perhaps I could've found a solution.
everyone wants the things they don't have, and the fact that you know that you can't have kids makes you want kids even more, this is life.

You don't know what it's like with me either, easy for a person to speak about their problems and play the victim when they don't know what the other is like, But you know it goes both ways, as you believe I'm doing this to you.
Just like you there's things are built into my soul that prevent me from having things that normal people can, if i had to describe it you in simplistic terms it's like a void that can never be filled/Satisfied/fulfilled, no matter how much or hard i try to fill it, it always leaves me wanting more, frustrating, and this is a deliberate thing in my design, it helps me do the things i do and need to do.
There are also other things that normal people can experience, but i simply can't[literally] by design, frustrating, you don't know me, don't think that you do, you believe I'm normal like the rest, I'm not like you, but I'm my own kind of freak.

"but why can't you understand that I want to be able to have enjoyable sex normally in a straightforward way, just like everyone else?"
You're rather presumptuous to think that i don't understand, annoyingly so.

There's a positive and negative side to all things, you've chosen to focus on your negative side, I've been trying to tell you this, but you just kept telling me about the flaws in your design, everyone's birth chart has a Saturn and a Jupiter, A negative and a positive, reality is cruel and painful.
Change is inevitable, and you wouldn't want to change if you didn't have problems, if there wasn't a Saturn in your life to cause you problems and obstacles you would have just remained the same and not seek to change, improve and become stronger.

I'm sorry for ranting; I shouldn't have lost my composure like that. I know that other people have things they struggle with too, especially here. Many come here because they are looking for solutions for problems that may seem insurmountable otherwise.

To be a mother when I grow up is something I've wanted since before I knew I couldn't. That's why I assumed that my desire was genuine, but I can't deny that I've despaired immensely in my past lives at my inability to provide for the child wish of whatever partners I had. Perhaps that is still influencing me to an extent and making me feel more pressured to find a way.

You're absolutely right that people think they want the things they can't have more than they really do deep down. I still think it's something that I really want, but probably not to the point of obsession like I feel currently. My partner and I aren't even ready to have children yet for other reasons, so it seems a bit odd now that I felt such a sense of urgency. I should just take my time with it and relax.

I'm sorry for assuming you wouldn't understand. I've been called delusional, unrealistic, unreasonable and misguided when I opened up to other people about what I really want; told that I should give up, or that my feelings are wrong. That made me think that you probably wouldn't understand either. But I shouldn't have assumed that. Thank you for understanding.

Recently when I had a conversation with luis about homosexual people with a child wish, he told me that homosexuals don't really want that kind of thing deep down and that they only feel that way due to programming. That made me wonder if it was just me then whose nature didn't make much sense; if there was some kind of plan for everyone else but me. As a result, I felt a bit lost and jaded. I don't mean this in a bad way, but to hear that you feel similarly, that I'm not alone in this, woke me up from a haze. Thank you, and sorry for coming across as someone with a victim complex. I hope that someday, somehow, you find a way to fill your void.

I do sympathize with your desire to have kids, and i hope that you find a way, without getting rid of the things that make you unique and fascinating.

Before I found meditation, I was ashamed of everything masculine about me and tried to hide it and keep it inside. I thought that surely it was because I was too masculine as a person that I was born like this, as some kind of punishment. But in meditation, I gradually began to notice a spark inside of me; a spark of incredibly bright and unrelenting energy that wants to make its way out. When I started to embrace it, it felt so invigorating; I became more healthy physically, and am much stronger now than one would expect from the size of my muscles. I realised that it doesn't matter if I'm masculine inside, because by using this immense, burning strength, I can protect all that I love and destroy all that I hate. Suddenly I started to feel proud of how tall I am too.

On the other side, I've always been very creative and sensitive, to the point that I've been considered "gifted" in multiple ways since I was a child. As for sex, despite the fact that it's only astrally for now, I know that I'm able to find more pleasure from it than even most women have ever felt in their lives, let alone men; at times it's like my Soul itself becomes like a supernova, and learning to handle and use all that energy has been incredibly useful in accelerating my spiritual growth. It took a lot of effort from me and my partner to even reach the point where we're able to do this, but it was absolutely worth it.

Even when someday I'm able to have sex physically, and have kids... These spiritual aspects of mine aren't something I'll ever let go of. You're right, it really is a blessing in its own way. In that regard, I've really come to love the way I am. I was frustrated at the difficulties it caused for me physically, but there's really so much more to it than that; and by learning to make these two sides of me work together, I'm able to do things that most would consider exceptional. I'm starting to see what you mean.

And you desire for fulfilling sex, does in fact push you towards developing your psychic side, doesn't it?

How many people can say they became able to telepathically communicate with another human reliably and blatantly confirmably in less than a year since they started meditating? One thing led to another, and I've come incredibly far as I've kept on pushing my boundaries in search of ways to do the things I've always dreamt of. I found myself capable of many things that I would never even have thought were even possible until I found the Joy of Satan. I've done the same things in many of my past lives, so much of this so far has just been me picking up where I left off; but who knows how far I'll be able to go this time, in this changing world?

The person who told me about JoS, said that those who have mastered this path (our Gods and Goddesses) are not only immortal, but able to change their physical form at will. I don't know whether the latter is allegory or fact, but those two things have been my deepest wishes since my adolescent years. For years I had felt lost because I thought I lived in a dull, empty world where such things didn't exist. The first time I meditated, it was like the entire world around me became colourful for the first time since my childhood. I immediately recognized this was what I was missing all along, and dedicated after a week. I was so enthusiastic that I went a bit crazy with the blood after it wouldn't come out at first, like "take my signature, sign me up!", while it felt as though Father Satan was watching me and trying to gesture that He appreciated my enthusiasm, but that it would've been fine for me to try again another time with a better needle. Even to this day, although I'm a bit more grounded than I was back then, that enthusiasm still hasn't waned.

If I had been born a normal woman in my first life... I'm sure I would've still had my share of problems, but nothing that would've pushed me to such relentlessness determination to unravel the workings of nature and the aether itself. To be honest, I'm well aware that it's my "impossible" ambitions that made me who I am today and brought me here; could it be the same for you?

I thought you weren't understanding what I was trying to say, but I see you were trying to help me see things in a more positive light. Thank you, it worked and I feel much better now.

When i said that people want what they don't have, i also meant that's normal, desires are a good thing, they push people into action.

Personally i don't care if children for homos are natural or not, if i wanted it i'd have gotten it, and if you ask me, i'd say you should be more worried about the raising a child instead of worrying if it's natural or not.
Because children take a lot of love, money, and time to raise(properly).

Either way i'm glad you've seen the positive sides of yourself, a real shame i don't give out my contact publicly, you're a person i can relate too, even if we're not freakish in the same ways.

"To be honest, I'm well aware that it's my "impossible" ambitions that made me who I am today and brought me here; could it be the same for you?"
It's not, and i don't like talking about my life either, it's straight up fucked, my childhood was fucked, my life is now better than it was before i've learnt a lot and became stronger, but conflict never ends for me, and i consider this a good thing.
But like you i do have high ambitions too, yes.

 

[Aquarius]

..

I still remember about this thread.
About the general consensus part, I was wrong, as I mixed some concepts I had in my mind and mistakenly thought I read that, and yes, I should've immediately gave reference but I reacted in egopathic way and refused to do so, which I apologize for.

 

[EA666]

You keep saying, if I was completely this or that,
man, that irritates me, my gamer friends always telling man, man look at these e-girls on twitch, look how easy they have it, all they gotta do is show tits and do fuck all to make tons of money.
got feminists on the other end, saying how easy men have it, and how much 'privilege' they got.
like, bruh.
Everyone thinks if they were 'this' or 'that' there problems would just magically go away, it won't.
Easy to see the things in others, that you do not have.

I've been asking why you can't have kids, because I sympathize with your desires, perhaps I could've found a solution.
everyone wants the things they don't have, and the fact that you know that you can't have kids makes you want kids even more, this is life.

You don't know what it's like with me either, easy for a person to speak about their problems and play the victim when they don't know what the other is like, But you know it goes both ways, as you believe I'm doing this to you.
Just like you there's things are built into my soul that prevent me from having things that normal people can, if i had to describe it you in simplistic terms it's like a void that can never be filled/Satisfied/fulfilled, no matter how much or hard i try to fill it, it always leaves me wanting more, frustrating, and this is a deliberate thing in my design, it helps me do the things i do and need to do.
There are also other things that normal people can experience, but i simply can't[literally] by design, frustrating, you don't know me, don't think that you do, you believe I'm normal like the rest, I'm not like you, but I'm my own kind of freak.

"but why can't you understand that I want to be able to have enjoyable sex normally in a straightforward way, just like everyone else?"
You're rather presumptuous to think that i don't understand, annoyingly so.

There's a positive and negative side to all things, you've chosen to focus on your negative side, I've been trying to tell you this, but you just kept telling me about the flaws in your design, everyone's birth chart has a Saturn and a Jupiter, A negative and a positive, reality is cruel and painful.
Change is inevitable, and you wouldn't want to change if you didn't have problems, if there wasn't a Saturn in your life to cause you problems and obstacles you would have just remained the same and not seek to change, improve and become stronger.

I'm sorry for ranting; I shouldn't have lost my composure like that. I know that other people have things they struggle with too, especially here. Many come here because they are looking for solutions for problems that may seem insurmountable otherwise.

To be a mother when I grow up is something I've wanted since before I knew I couldn't. That's why I assumed that my desire was genuine, but I can't deny that I've despaired immensely in my past lives at my inability to provide for the child wish of whatever partners I had. Perhaps that is still influencing me to an extent and making me feel more pressured to find a way.

You're absolutely right that people think they want the things they can't have more than they really do deep down. I still think it's something that I really want, but probably not to the point of obsession like I feel currently. My partner and I aren't even ready to have children yet for other reasons, so it seems a bit odd now that I felt such a sense of urgency. I should just take my time with it and relax.

I'm sorry for assuming you wouldn't understand. I've been called delusional, unrealistic, unreasonable and misguided when I opened up to other people about what I really want; told that I should give up, or that my feelings are wrong. That made me think that you probably wouldn't understand either. But I shouldn't have assumed that. Thank you for understanding.

Recently when I had a conversation with luis about homosexual people with a child wish, he told me that homosexuals don't really want that kind of thing deep down and that they only feel that way due to programming. That made me wonder if it was just me then whose nature didn't make much sense; if there was some kind of plan for everyone else but me. As a result, I felt a bit lost and jaded. I don't mean this in a bad way, but to hear that you feel similarly, that I'm not alone in this, woke me up from a haze. Thank you, and sorry for coming across as someone with a victim complex. I hope that someday, somehow, you find a way to fill your void.

I do sympathize with your desire to have kids, and i hope that you find a way, without getting rid of the things that make you unique and fascinating.

Before I found meditation, I was ashamed of everything masculine about me and tried to hide it and keep it inside. I thought that surely it was because I was too masculine as a person that I was born like this, as some kind of punishment. But in meditation, I gradually began to notice a spark inside of me; a spark of incredibly bright and unrelenting energy that wants to make its way out. When I started to embrace it, it felt so invigorating; I became more healthy physically, and am much stronger now than one would expect from the size of my muscles. I realised that it doesn't matter if I'm masculine inside, because by using this immense, burning strength, I can protect all that I love and destroy all that I hate. Suddenly I started to feel proud of how tall I am too.

On the other side, I've always been very creative and sensitive, to the point that I've been considered "gifted" in multiple ways since I was a child. As for sex, despite the fact that it's only astrally for now, I know that I'm able to find more pleasure from it than even most women have ever felt in their lives, let alone men; at times it's like my Soul itself becomes like a supernova, and learning to handle and use all that energy has been incredibly useful in accelerating my spiritual growth. It took a lot of effort from me and my partner to even reach the point where we're able to do this, but it was absolutely worth it.

Even when someday I'm able to have sex physically, and have kids... These spiritual aspects of mine aren't something I'll ever let go of. You're right, it really is a blessing in its own way. In that regard, I've really come to love the way I am. I was frustrated at the difficulties it caused for me physically, but there's really so much more to it than that; and by learning to make these two sides of me work together, I'm able to do things that most would consider exceptional. I'm starting to see what you mean.

And you desire for fulfilling sex, does in fact push you towards developing your psychic side, doesn't it?

How many people can say they became able to telepathically communicate with another human reliably and blatantly confirmably in less than a year since they started meditating? One thing led to another, and I've come incredibly far as I've kept on pushing my boundaries in search of ways to do the things I've always dreamt of. I found myself capable of many things that I would never even have thought were even possible until I found the Joy of Satan. I've done the same things in many of my past lives, so much of this so far has just been me picking up where I left off; but who knows how far I'll be able to go this time, in this changing world?

The person who told me about JoS, said that those who have mastered this path (our Gods and Goddesses) are not only immortal, but able to change their physical form at will. I don't know whether the latter is allegory or fact, but those two things have been my deepest wishes since my adolescent years. For years I had felt lost because I thought I lived in a dull, empty world where such things didn't exist. The first time I meditated, it was like the entire world around me became colourful for the first time since my childhood. I immediately recognized this was what I was missing all along, and dedicated after a week. I was so enthusiastic that I went a bit crazy with the blood after it wouldn't come out at first, like "take my signature, sign me up!", while it felt as though Father Satan was watching me and trying to gesture that He appreciated my enthusiasm, but that it would've been fine for me to try again another time with a better needle. Even to this day, although I'm a bit more grounded than I was back then, that enthusiasm still hasn't waned.

If I had been born a normal woman in my first life... I'm sure I would've still had my share of problems, but nothing that would've pushed me to such relentlessness determination to unravel the workings of nature and the aether itself. To be honest, I'm well aware that it's my "impossible" ambitions that made me who I am today and brought me here; could it be the same for you?

I thought you weren't understanding what I was trying to say, but I see you were trying to help me see things in a more positive light. Thank you, it worked and I feel much better now.

When i said that people want what they don't have, i also meant that's normal, desires are a good thing, they push people into action.

Personally i don't care if children for homos are natural or not, if i wanted it i'd have gotten it, and if you ask me, i'd say you should be more worried about the raising a child instead of worrying if it's natural or not.
Because children take a lot of love, money, and time to raise(properly).

Either way i'm glad you've seen the positive sides of yourself, a real shame i don't give out my contact publicly, you're a person i can relate too, even if we're not freakish in the same ways.

"To be honest, I'm well aware that it's my "impossible" ambitions that made me who I am today and brought me here; could it be the same for you?"
It's not, and i don't like talking about my life either, it's straight up fucked, my childhood was fucked, my life is now better than it was before i've learnt a lot and became stronger, but conflict never ends for me, and i consider this a good thing.
But like you i do have high ambitions too, yes.

Who the fuck are you and say FREAK to someone here?

 

[Rook]

..

I still remember about this thread.
About the general consensus part, I was wrong, as I mixed some concepts I had in my mind and mistakenly thought I read that, and yes, I should've immediately gave reference but I reacted in egopathic way and refused to do so, which I apologize for.

Takes courage to say this,
to me the apology is not necessary, these sort of things happen, it's human nature.

understand that arguments happen all the time, i don't really hold anything against you, never did in fact.

Everyone has their own problems to deal with in life.

 

[EA666]

...

Who the fuck are you and say FREAK to someone here?

Thank you for standing up for me, but I don't think he meant it in a demeaning way. He probably meant it literally here, since one of the definitions of "freak" is "a person, animal, or plant with an unusual physical abnormality." Perhaps it was just to tease me, or perhaps it was even meant as a compliment if he finds unusual things fascinating.

Either way, I'm fine. I didn't take offense to it. Maybe I'm too tolerant, though. "Freak" does have some harsh connotations most of the time, and I personally enjoy feeling like I can be a normal person too despite what I'm like. I don't like being treated as though I'm different. Even so, he didn't seem to mean it as an insult.

He shouldn’t say it. I looked at his previous posts, he has a wording problem and he doesn't look like a normal person. I couldn't get good energy from him. This is the first time that i'm disgusted with someone here.

 

[Jack]

I'm sorry for ranting; I shouldn't have lost my composure like that. I know that other people have things they struggle with too, especially here. Many come here because they are looking for solutions for problems that may seem insurmountable otherwise.

To be a mother when I grow up is something I've wanted since before I knew I couldn't. That's why I assumed that my desire was genuine, but I can't deny that I've despaired immensely in my past lives at my inability to provide for the child wish of whatever partners I had. Perhaps that is still influencing me to an extent and making me feel more pressured to find a way.

You're absolutely right that people think they want the things they can't have more than they really do deep down. I still think it's something that I really want, but probably not to the point of obsession like I feel currently. My partner and I aren't even ready to have children yet for other reasons, so it seems a bit odd now that I felt such a sense of urgency. I should just take my time with it and relax.

I'm sorry for assuming you wouldn't understand. I've been called delusional, unrealistic, unreasonable and misguided when I opened up to other people about what I really want; told that I should give up, or that my feelings are wrong. That made me think that you probably wouldn't understand either. But I shouldn't have assumed that. Thank you for understanding.

Recently when I had a conversation with luis about homosexual people with a child wish, he told me that homosexuals don't really want that kind of thing deep down and that they only feel that way due to programming. That made me wonder if it was just me then whose nature didn't make much sense; if there was some kind of plan for everyone else but me. As a result, I felt a bit lost and jaded. I don't mean this in a bad way, but to hear that you feel similarly, that I'm not alone in this, woke me up from a haze. Thank you, and sorry for coming across as someone with a victim complex. I hope that someday, somehow, you find a way to fill your void.


Before I found meditation, I was ashamed of everything masculine about me and tried to hide it and keep it inside. I thought that surely it was because I was too masculine as a person that I was born like this, as some kind of punishment. But in meditation, I gradually began to notice a spark inside of me; a spark of incredibly bright and unrelenting energy that wants to make its way out. When I started to embrace it, it felt so invigorating; I became more healthy physically, and am much stronger now than one would expect from the size of my muscles. I realised that it doesn't matter if I'm masculine inside, because by using this immense, burning strength, I can protect all that I love and destroy all that I hate. Suddenly I started to feel proud of how tall I am too.

On the other side, I've always been very creative and sensitive, to the point that I've been considered "gifted" in multiple ways since I was a child. As for sex, despite the fact that it's only astrally for now, I know that I'm able to find more pleasure from it than even most women have ever felt in their lives, let alone men; at times it's like my Soul itself becomes like a supernova, and learning to handle and use all that energy has been incredibly useful in accelerating my spiritual growth. It took a lot of effort from me and my partner to even reach the point where we're able to do this, but it was absolutely worth it.

Even when someday I'm able to have sex physically, and have kids... These spiritual aspects of mine aren't something I'll ever let go of. You're right, it really is a blessing in its own way. In that regard, I've really come to love the way I am. I was frustrated at the difficulties it caused for me physically, but there's really so much more to it than that; and by learning to make these two sides of me work together, I'm able to do things that most would consider exceptional. I'm starting to see what you mean.


How many people can say they became able to telepathically communicate with another human reliably and blatantly confirmably in less than a year since they started meditating? One thing led to another, and I've come incredibly far as I've kept on pushing my boundaries in search of ways to do the things I've always dreamt of. I found myself capable of many things that I would never even have thought were even possible until I found the Joy of Satan. I've done the same things in many of my past lives, so much of this so far has just been me picking up where I left off; but who knows how far I'll be able to go this time, in this changing world?

The person who told me about JoS, said that those who have mastered this path (our Gods and Goddesses) are not only immortal, but able to change their physical form at will. I don't know whether the latter is allegory or fact, but those two things have been my deepest wishes since my adolescent years. For years I had felt lost because I thought I lived in a dull, empty world where such things didn't exist. The first time I meditated, it was like the entire world around me became colourful for the first time since my childhood. I immediately recognized this was what I was missing all along, and dedicated after a week. I was so enthusiastic that I went a bit crazy with the blood after it wouldn't come out at first, like "take my signature, sign me up!", while it felt as though Father Satan was watching me and trying to gesture that He appreciated my enthusiasm, but that it would've been fine for me to try again another time with a better needle. Even to this day, although I'm a bit more grounded than I was back then, that enthusiasm still hasn't waned.

If I had been born a normal woman in my first life... I'm sure I would've still had my share of problems, but nothing that would've pushed me to such relentlessness determination to unravel the workings of nature and the aether itself. To be honest, I'm well aware that it's my "impossible" ambitions that made me who I am today and brought me here; could it be the same for you?

I thought you weren't understanding what I was trying to say, but I see you were trying to help me see things in a more positive light. Thank you, it worked and I feel much better now.

When i said that people want what they don't have, i also meant that's normal, desires are a good thing, they push people into action.

Personally i don't care if children for homos are natural or not, if i wanted it i'd have gotten it, and if you ask me, i'd say you should be more worried about the raising a child instead of worrying if it's natural or not.
Because children take a lot of love, money, and time to raise(properly).

Either way i'm glad you've seen the positive sides of yourself, a real shame i don't give out my contact publicly, you're a person i can relate too, even if we're not freakish in the same ways.

"To be honest, I'm well aware that it's my "impossible" ambitions that made me who I am today and brought me here; could it be the same for you?"
It's not, and i don't like talking about my life either, it's straight up fucked, my childhood was fucked, my life is now better than it was before i've learnt a lot and became stronger, but conflict never ends for me, and i consider this a good thing.
But like you i do have high ambitions too, yes.

Who the fuck are you and say FREAK to someone here?

Freak -

one that is markedly unusual or abnormal

https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/freak

In clinical settings, the term "disorders of sex development" (DSD) has been used since 2006,[22] a shift in language considered controversial since its introduction.[23][24][25]

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Intersex